Tuesday, September 11, 2012

Day Two

August 31st, 2012

Day two after getting the news from the Doctor that my hearing was leaving.  I woke up grumpy.  I mostly stayed somber.  I spent the day at home with Chase and for that I was grateful.  He made me smile - he made me laugh and I took in every moment with him.  Whenever things would quiet I would remember.  The ringing always reminds me.  It seems even louder now and I really hope that is not the case. 

My next appointment is Wednesday with the hearing aid woman to get the paperwork going.  Then the next day I see the specialist.  Not much longer to wait to see if I can get a few more answers - just a bit more information and a chance for me to ask him my biggest fear. 

As I put Carter down for bed this evening he decided to scare me by jumping out from behind a chair and screaming "Boo!",  in my ear.  When he did a loud PINGGGGGGG went through my ear and I had a bit of pain.  I told him that I should not be exposed to loud noises so no yelling directly in my ears and he agreed. (He is very particular about his ears :))  I then told him that mommy would be getting hearing aids in both ears and that would mean that I do not have to ask him what he was saying all the time anymore.  This made him happy but he also had the willies cause he hates anything in his ear.  I reassured him that mommy didn't mind and it would be fine. 

It's time to decide how I want to address this in prayer.  I honestly have not been able to figure that out yet. I have no overwhelming urge to ask God to take it away but in the same breath I do not want it to happen.  I think I am still in denial.  I am going to probably need to hear it from a second Doctor before it truly sets in.